Tuesday, September 23, 2014

I'm so fucking inspired I can’t even with your (conservative) shit anymore: not even with full consent

Y’know what? I fucking love my fellow leftie feminist greenies. I do. Some are my peers or my mentors and some are the people younger than me who inspire me. Whether they tweet, write letters, wave signs at protests, run not-for-profit advocacy groups, mount plays or get arrested, I fucking love their style.

It’s charming to be around them virtually and in person, and they make me super happy.

As for those who aren’t my people, I’m sure they’re perfectly nice when I’m not around. I’d rather not harsh my buzz by testing that theory, however. There are some complete knobheads, of course, who think they deserve to live in their parents' world and are scared shitless that they won’t. The future is going to be an amazing enema for them, and even the bible says that time waits for no one, not even constipated conservative larvae.

And then there are the hardcore neo-cons who are chewing the scenery because they can’t impose their parents' parents' world on me and my people. I just tell them not to swallow. If you swallow, it won’t end well; take note Prime Minister AUST#28.

Back to the people I love though.

My favourite fabulous people are feminists who bathe in misogynist tears. They have REALLY soft skin y’all, and sometimes they eat misogynists for breakfast and then write about it and it’s hilarious. Sometimes trolls try to eat them instead, and they write about it and it's hideous. But hilarious or hideous, it keeps the tears flowing so they can keep up their beauty regimes.

Sometimes we hang out with climate warriors and their battle bicycles and fondness for tree-and-gate-based public chaining events. Sometimes I wonder why EL James didn’t base her novels (You Know The Ones, The Terrible Ones) on non-violent protesters across the ages, because they were into kink, consent and communication from way back. I’ve lost my train of thought ...

Oh yeah, fucking loving the progressives, that’s where I was. I love their It’s Complicated hatred of capitalist and patriarchal bullshit, I love their renewable passion for progress and innovation and I love their democratic restraints on unfettered and regressive government policy. I love them all.

And I hear conservatives have really bad sex. I’m just sayin’

Whether it’s promoting indigenous issues, building communities, rooting out institutionalised violence, supporting sustainable energy, discussing civil liberties, improving education and health, welcoming refugees, being vegan or just having a bit of a Bleeding Heart Flounce because someone doesn’t feel exactly the same way about Palestine, I’m there with my people, being inspired.

And sometimes getting just the tiniest bit turned on, but don’t mind me.